As a two-cancer queen, I have been very fortunate to have enjoyed a long period of stability with both cancers. In many respects you can be lulled into a false sense of security, when you have gone for a long period with no progression. Unfortunately, this came to an abrupt halt recently and in fact every time I’ve started to update this blog something else has happened. To recap, I have regular 3 monthly scans for my stage 4 melanoma and in early September I was feeling well and not thinking too much about them. When I went in for my results my Oncologist informed me my CT scan was ok but the MRI scan of the brain had not yet been reported. He was not unduly concerned as he said if there was something on the scan the radiographer normally calls them.
The following week, as Dave was driving us across London en-route to his Mum’s 80th birthday weekend, I received a call from the melanoma team to say that there was a slight change around a blood vessel on the brain scan but it was inconclusive, so they wanted to repeat the scans. As I was away for a family weekend, a more detailed scan was repeated the following week. This scan came back the same and was described as “indeterminate” so my team recommended the scans should be repeated in 6 weeks rather than the normal 12 weeks. I went away and tried to forget about it; my Mum was coming down for a week from Scotland and in early November, David and I had a much-needed week’s holiday to Spain – Malaga and Cordoba planned which I was looking forward to.
Our week in Spain was fabulous and I came back refreshed and ready for my next scans. Following the scans, I was due to catch up for the results with Prof. Larkin in the Friday clinic, however, I received a call to say that the scan report was not yet reported, so they moved my appointment to the following Monday. I didn’t think too much about this over the weekend and on the Monday morning I received a call from my Oncologist to say the scan still wasn’t reported and could I come in the following day. As it happened, I was travelling up to Scotland on that Tuesday so arrived at the hospital with my bag ready to go straight to the airport. I had a bad feeling that morning and when David and I went into the consultation Prof. Larkin told me that they did now think it was a new melanoma tumour in the brain and I would need treatment to address this. It was explained that the tumour was very small but in the temporal lobe. They were recommending SRS radiotherapy using the Cyberknife machine which targets the tumour very specifically with radiotherapy 30X the strength of a regular radiotherapy with very little damage to the surrounding cells. I would be referred to the NeuroOncologist Dr Liam Welsh the specialist consultant who would oversee this treatment.
When you receive news of progression, your overriding reaction is to want to get on with the treatment. However, both David and Prof. Larkin encouraged me to get on the flight to Scotland and go and see my Mum and family for a week as it would take some time to get everything planned and a week wouldn’t make any difference. This was the correct decision as I felt much better once I got to Scotland, watched the incredible football match of them qualifying for the World Cup and caught up with family. David also managed to come up to Scotland for the weekend which really helped update Mum with the latest news. After a week in Linlithgow and seeing family I was feeling much better and ready to tackle the situation head on.
When I arrived back in London it was back to Marsden HQ to meet Dr Liam Welsh, the NeuroOncologist. He was great and over the next 40 minutes, he talked David and I through the situation and the process that I would face and I felt very reassured. The following week, I had a preparatory session which included a mask fitting (Hannibal Lecter Style) and a 3D MRI Scan of the section of the brain. The mask fitting was particularly claustrophobic but I was assured that by the time the holes were fitted for the mouth and nose it would be easier to breathe. It took a week for the SRS radiotherapy to be programmed and it was scheduled for Friday Dec 12. I had a few sleepless nights that week and the day before the treatment I received a message to say that the session was due to last approx. 40 mins.
I arrived on the Friday morning feeling nervous but just wanting to get on with the treatment. It lasted 40 mins and whilst the mask was claustrophobic it was bearable. The cyberknife machine moved around me (like a large scanner) and I had 90’s music playing. It was tempting to have a boogie along to Madonna music pumping away but I obviously had to try and stay still. The 40 mins was over fairly quickly and painlessly and after being fully briefed on potential side effects, I was ready to leave the hospital. I was feeling ok and relieved that it was over. I had been warned that I may be feeling tired, I may have a headache and experience hair shedding in the area but it shouldn’t be noticeable.
The next day was the morning of our annual Xmas party so I set off for my Bounce (trampolining) fitness class as my Oncologist had told me that continuing with my fitness, as long as I felt well enough, could help with the fatigue that may result after the radiotherapy. I was feeling good until I noticed on the Royal Marsden patient app that the follow up appointment with Dr Welsh had been changed from a telephone appointment to an in-person appointment. This sent me into a panic as I had been told the day before I would have a follow up telephone call the following Thursday. I immediately assumed that something was wrong and something else had appeared on the MRI brain scan. David calmed me down and said I should call my nurse Nikki on the Monday and enjoy our Xmas party with all our friends. We did have a fantastic Xmas party and I tried to temporarily forgot about all of the melanoma worry to have an amazing evening.
On the Monday, I called my nurse at Marsden HQ and informed her of my concern. She called me back and said that she didn’t think there was any reason to be concerned and following the treatment, Dr Welsh preferred to see patients in person to checkup they were doing ok. This settled me, but the next day I noticed that blood tests had been added to the patient app and I had just had blood tests the week before which were all ok. I started to let my mind run away and concluded that I was being switched back to immunotherapy treatment. The next couple of days were very stressful, I didn’t sleep and was not feeling very hungry. By the time my appointment with Dr Welsh came round on Thursday morning I was very anxious. Fortunately, the appointment was early and as Dave and I arrived at the hospital I was so pleased to see my nurse Nikki who was also going to join for my appointment. When we got into the appointment Dr Welsh told me that everything had gone well with my treatment and there was nothing else had appeared on my brain scan. I felt such a relief after all of the stress of the previous week. I was booked in for a follow up scan at the end of Jan and could now go off and enjoy Xmas with family and friends. I left the Marsden with a spring in my step after all of the worry of the previous few weeks.
Whilst having a Patient App is no doubt a step forward in making things more efficient, receiving updates without context, can be very unsettling. It turns out that the additional blood test request was from my dermatologist for a specific test to determine if a rash that had developed was related to my current medication, which it was. Unbeknown to my dermatologist, the timing of the request appearing on my Patient App, came at a time of heightened stress!
In addition to melanoma, I also have primary breast cancer which was originally diagnosed in 2016. It has always taken a back seat to the melanoma and has been kept under control for the last 5 years by taking tamoxifen. However, at my last check up at the end of October I had an MRI scan which showed that the tamoxifen was no longer working and 2 new small tumours had developed in my right breast. Following discussion with my Oncologist, my drug treatment has been changed to letrozole to see if that can get it under control and we would review this in 3 months at which point if this is not working, I would probably need to have surgery. Given everything that has been going on with my melanoma which clearly presents more of a risk I have parked this at the back of my mind for now although I did decide that I needed to get myself as fit and healthy as possible in order to make the recovery from any potential surgery as good as possible if that is required. I’m hoping that over the next couple of months, following updated scans I will have a clearer plan on both the melanoma and the breast cancer.
The last few months of 2025 have been tough. After 8 years of stability with the melanoma everything was turned upside down and I was taken back to 2017 when I was originally diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma. The worry, the prospect of changing drug treatments, surgery and running out of options all came firmly into focus. One afternoon when I was struggling with everything, I watched a presentation of fellow melanoma patient Jordan Moss who spoke at the last Melanoma Patient Conference about the power of the mind in helping to stay calm and focused. I have to say that this really helped me and lifted me when I was feeling stressed and anxious and did help to give me hope and I would recommend watching this to other patients who are struggling right now. David, my rockstar husband, has continued to encourage me to take one day at a time which can be challenging at times but I know it is best not to let your mind runaway with itself hard as that can be. I have spoken to other patients who have been through the same treatment and that has been really helpful plus good friends have helped to keep me distracted doing lovely things in the run up to Xmas and that has been really special.
We had a lovely Xmas and New Year in Scotland and it was so good to spend time with all of our loved ones and forget about cancer for a while. Back in London and as I publish this blog, I am feeling well and looking forward to a few days skiing with good friends in Chatel, France. Albeit getting travel insurance did, once again, test the stress levels! I have also started looking at options for Team Shomelanoma challenges for 2026 and will be back with more of that along with a health update in the next Shomelanoma blog. Thank you as always for all the incredible support over the last few months and I’ll be back with more Shomelanoma adventures soon.
Shomelanoma 